Read a little of my short story!!!??? i really need feedback! :) please help!?

Oh my gosh this story is absolutely amazing! I want to read more of it. Although in a couple of places when you say "pretty" or "Really pretty" you could replace it with words like beautiful or breathtaking. Over all I LOVE it and stories like this are always the best! You should keep righting you might have a best-seller right there. Great job!!